Darkest/Best Blackbear Lyrics




No lyric bc I'm about to drop some below 

 If you know me, you know I'm obsessed with music.

 And one of my favorite artists is Blackbear, most famously known for his song "do re mi". He's dark, blunt, honest, unapologetic, and brooding. Aka sexy asf. He also has a splendid way of using antithesis (I told you my nerdy side would come out). Anyway, if you need an angsty instagram caption... look no further. 

  Let's delve into my favorite lyrics from his songs: 

"If you can't see what's in front of you, you lose." -4U Acoustic

 "I would wish you the best, but you already had it." -wish u the best

 "Swear to god she's a blessing and a curse, should've learned from you." -Girls Like U 

 "You wake up everyday and make me feel like I'm incompetent." -do re mi 

 "I'm running out of time to hold you close, running out of time to be your man." -4U 

 "And if you know what's best for you and me, you should leave." -Weak When Ur Around 

 "I act like I don't fucking care, cause I'm so fucking scared." -idfc 

 "She got a runny nose, I don't think that it's the flu." -wish u the best 

 "Had a vision, getting married, having kids and let's be honest, only thing I'm raising is these fucking digits." -wish u the best 

 "Don't want to put you on blast, but you should go head and practice." -STFU 


My First Songwriting Class (!!!!)


"I wish I didn't have to rhyme every time I sang" -Twenty One Pilots, Stressed Out, 2015

Yesterday, I had my first class at Clive Davis, the Recorded Music studio at Tisch. I've been wanting to take a Songwriting class for so long but never got around to it and I am sooo happy that I am doing this. Right away, I felt like I was one hundred percent in the right place which is SUCH a good feeling.

Above is the list of rules we got the first day and I think it perfectly reflects the vibe I am going for right now. I just wanna fucking break rules and work hard and work off other people and enjoy myself. I love writing, I love music, and I love singing. I have to write a song in 24 hours which I am kind of freaking out about but I'm also really excited for. I know it's good to be challenging myself and the song may very well happen at 4am tonight, but that's okay. 

I'm also really excited to hear what other people write and get to co-write with my fellow classmates. But most of all, I'm just really happy that I get this opportunity to explore this passion of mine and see where it goes. Like maybe I'll take this class and realize that this is a total hobby for me. Or maybe I'll be like wow, I have to pursue this. I'm not sure. 

But I really do think I caught the songwriting bug. Now I am just constantly thinking about writing songs and wanting to really do this. So I don't know where this road is going to lead but all I know is that I am so excited. 

Journaling is a big part of the class, which I love, because I really do enjoy writing. And reading voraciously. Which I sometimes have a hard time with because I get really unfocused. But I hope to write at least 10 songs in the next few weeks and maybe even record them on my own. Anyways, this isn't a long post. Just an update in my life. Pce.  



How to Spice Things Up When Life Gets Mundane


I'm trying to focus my attention, but I feel so A.D.D- Natasha Bedingfield, These Words, 2004

My friends made fun of me for basically an entire night because I came home after classes one day and boldly stated that my life was so mundane.

And I went on to explain that I felt like I was in the same routine, doing the same things, in the same boring classes, seeing the same people, and everything just felt so ordinary. Of course, I love my friends, I love my coursework, I love New York Freaking City and it's definitely not a boring place. I'm so grateful for everything I have and am learning more and more how to appreciate every little aspect of my life. However, I just felt like I was in a rut of going through the motions and not giving 100 percent to any task I was involved with. 

Now I'm not saying that life always needs to be crazy and busy because that can suck too, but I do like to keep my life spicy and interesting.  And with this bleh weather (it's cloudy asf), it can be easy to just feel super unmotivated. 

Without further ado (I first spelled it adue and then got spell check to help me out, t god..) , here are 10 tips TO SPICE THINGS UP!!

1.) Schedule a coffee/lunch date with someone you don't see often. (Even better, try a new spot!) I'm always amazed about the connections I make with people I don't expect to. There's nothing better than just realizing like wow, this person is so cool, I'm so happy I asked them to hangout. And it takes vulnerability, but I swear, people want you to ask them to hangout, and sometimes it just takes that little extra effort. 
2.) Create, create, create. Anything. Write a poem/song/draw/make art/photograph/make a website. BLOG?!  
3.) Try something new alone. Don't bring your cell phone. Need to know the time? Ask a stranger with a watch. I went to a musical performance alone in Brooklyn and I was kinda tweaking about it even though I'm an extrovert and for the most part love strangers. And let me tell you. It was awesome- I made a friend with a dude from London who had way more life experience than me and I got to enjoy my favorite thing, music, without any distractions. So lit. 
4.) Speaking of music... Motivate with music. Nothing better than blasting some fire-ass music or discovering new music. Literally you can catch me on soundcloud for like two hours just listening to random remixes. A great time. 
5.) Get a lil' makeover. Get a spray tan. Get sugared. Put some purple in your hair. You'll feel like a new person. 
6.) CLEAN THE SHIT OUT OF SOMETHING. I'm serious. You're going to feel so accomplished after and it will honestly clear things up in your head, not just the space. 
7.) Go to a museum! See a ballet! Experience ~ART~
8.) Omg this one's my favorite. Go to Barnes & Nobles, grab a few books, sit in a corner and READ FO FREE. Ok this is one of my more criminal ideas and I'm really sorry to all of the talented authors and publishers who need to get paid but hey, if I love the book, I'll buy it anyway!  
9.) WorkOUT. Honestly, a workout can just totally reenergize you and make you want to be more productive and social. I know there's science behind it that I don't care to get into but from personal experience, every time I workout, I always feel refreshed and excited to tackle whatever's ahead of me. 
10.) Lastly, think about the craziest person you know and do something they would do. I have a cousin named Kari, and she's one of the most confident, outspoken people I know. I'm envious but mostly inspired by her constant exploration of life. She will strike up a conversation with literally anyone and ask them very personal questions lol. She even exploited me in front of the entire Victoria's Secret store on the day she dragged me to the mall to buy my FIRST BRA. That was embarrassing. But nonetheless I love her, and sometimes I just ask myself, What Would Kari Do? So find that person and practice your acting skills a bit. 

LET'S GET SPICY! 


I Saw a Kid Fall and it Was Enlightening


I get knocked down, but I get up again -Chumbawamba, Tubthumping, 1997 (this song came out the year I was born lol) 

As I was walking home from writing my teachers end of the year thank-you notes (I know, I know, I'm such a good person what the heck), I saw a kid fall on his face. Like literally FACE PLANT. It looked so painful, I didn't even laugh. Okay. That sounds awful. But sometimes people falling is kind of funny, right? At least I know there are times where I've fallen since I'm a hugeass clutz and I know people laugh and I'm okay with it because I'm sure it was hilarious. But then there are times where someone falls and you're actually unsure if they're okay? And you can't laugh because like what if they just cracked their head open or something?! I mean this kid literally ate cement. Haha. Wow I just giggled a little, maybe I am an awful person. 

 Anyways, as I tiptoe closer, I expect the kid to be sobbing. Because I mean. I would be. And like I said, that fall looked unsafe. I'm already empathizing with his poor parents who are probably going to have to go buy him an ice cream cone now and carry him for the rest of the way home.

 But that's when the unexpected happened. To my amazement, he GOT UP, brushed himself off, and continued on his path. 

 No crying, no sob story, no whining, no begging his parents for ice cream, no refusing to walk ever again. 

 And it just made me realize that sometimes, in life, you fall flat on your face and you just have to get back up. And yes, this little kid had gravity on his side given that he was probably under 4 feet tall but STILL. I was so impressed. Like I hope my kids are that resilient. Not that I'm thinking about having kids anytime soon. 

Anyways, I think that children have so much to teach us if we truly pay attention. They don't overthink, they don't follow their egos, they just live their best lives and for that, I think we all need to take notes. So next time life kicks you down and you don't see yourself getting back up, just remember, if this little kiddo can survive a fight with the sidewalk, you too, will get back up.

:-)



Switch Playground Class Review: 'Twas a HIIT



Bounce it for me, make it go trampoline- Kalin and Myles, Trampoline, 2014
Hey y'all! Happy day after Memorial Day! I'm all about new experiences and last night a friend reached out about taking a class at Switch Playground. It's super close to my apartment and so I figured I might as well go for it and I knew it was high intensity training which I prefer for my workouts.

So here's my review! I've never reviewed a fitness class before so let's get it. I'm gonna walk you through my experience and then share some final thoughts. 

I walked into the studio about 15 minutes before my class started (so at 8:15am). The girl at the front desk gave me a towel and put me on station 1 and asked if I was waiting for anyone to come. Yes, I told her, my friend was coming, so she explained that we would be we paired up for the class. I'm really glad that I had my friend with me because it took away the anxiety of being paired with a stranger (lol I still have PTSD from awkward gym classes in middle school).  

When I entered the studio, I was already impressed with the swanky environment and aesthetically pleasing lighting. It definitely felt like I was at some sort of cool club, and there were mirrors everywhere, which I was also a big fan of. Because obviously I needed to make sure my form was good ;) 

 We started the class with a brief yoga warmup, which I found a little bit weird to do before HIIT training, but I went with it, and it was kind of nice taking a few deep breaths. Then the class was essentially 20 2-minute stations. Some were cardio based and some were strength training based. There were four instructors explaining each station as we went which was cool because they definitely gave some good hands-on adjustments. For me, a few of the stations were a LOT harder than others, particularly the ones that were bicep and tricep focused. I liked the cardio stations because you can just do you, but I also wish I pushed myself a bit more on these stations. There were unique forms of cardio including a rowing station, which I actually enjoyed a lot more than I thought I would. 

My favorite part of the entire class was about three quarters of the way in because there was a station with MINI TRAMPOLINES! Not only is the song "Trampoline" by Kalin and Myles my jam, but oh man, I wanted to bounce on that thing the entire class. I just felt giddy jumping up and down, maybe because I loved trampolines or for some reason, it just kind of got the endorphins going? This part of class felt the most like I was actually on a goddamn playground. Yesssssss. It kind of inspired me to save money to get one in my apartment. Instant workout and again, so freaking fun. 

 Another very exhilarating component of the class was the in-house DJ. The whole experience felt very live and in the moment, with new songs for every station, instructors helping you, and "switch"ing so often. Although the songs were more remixes and I'm more of a lyric girl, I still really enjoyed it.

 And what I love is that they change their workouts for every class. So it doesn't really matter if you are a beginner at working out or an advanced weight lifter, every single class is going to challenge you. To me, this is really important, because I think it's so easy to get comfortable in a workout routine, even a class that you frequent, or a running route that you always take. But when you keep pushing yourself, are in uncomfortable situations, and challenging your limits, that's when the change happens in your mind and body. 

 Side note: while I was squatting, sweating, and staring into my friends eyes, it occurred to me that this would be fun to do with a romantic partner, because you kind of can't help but feel connected. So if you and your sig oth. need some couples therapy, I suggest going to a Switch Playground class together. 

 I took a shower after and I have to say, I think this studio has the most (like 6) showers of any other studio I've been to, which was awesome. I always feel a little weird showering at fitness studios (am I alone?) but the openness of the women's locker room made me really comfortable. 

So would I go again? Absolutely. I probably wouldn't go alone, only because like I said, it was really fun working out side by side with a girlfriend. However, maybe I'd make a new friend if I went alone, so perhaps that's something I should try. 

Hope you guys get the chance to check out this unique workout studio. 

Cheers to summer bodies being made in the summer!!! 

Reflection Post: I Was the Worst At Internships (WOATI)






I don't got a clue, no, I ain't no Scooby Doo -Help Me Help You, Logan Paul, 2017

WOATI= Worst of all time at internships.

  So this is going to be a reflection post and I'm also laughing hysterically as I write it because I truly was a terrible intern. Last summer I had two part-time internships and to say the least, I didn't thrive in the office setting. Like at all. Even finding a "business casual" outfit was a struggle. Both the internships were unpaid so maybe that's why I didn't work as hard as I should have. Or maybe I was distracted because summer in the city is so fun and I truly was partying like no other time of my life. Or maybe I just suck at being an intern. Anyways, it's about to get really real. Hopefully, my stupid intern mistakes will remind you to not drink with your coworkers if you have a huge mouth like me and to keep yourself in check by always being proactive and asking if people need help ( something I didn't do and I regret.) Whether your internship is paid or unpaid, you get what you give. Put in effort, ask questions, cultivate curiosity, ask the CEO to coffee etc. etc. and it's going to be worth it. You're probably thinking well, why would I take your advice? You just said you were the worst intern. 

 And you're right. I was. But I also got some cool shit done and had some great experiences that I'm not gonna list because you'd much rather read this, right?! 

 Things that I did that make me the WOATI:

 1. I broke the shredder machine because I put too many papers in.
2. One day I was so annoyed at another intern, I took a sticky note and wrote down all of the things he did that bothered me so then I could read it to my roommates when I got home. I know. So petty.
3. Took an hour break once because I was scared I might be pregnant. Bought a pregnancy test, took it in a Starbucks in Hell's Kitchen, ironic, because it was a hell kind of day. I remember this all too well. It was negative, by the way. 
4. I accidentally cleaned out the microwave with furniture cleaner, which freaked everyone out, so they closed down the microwave for like two days in case the toxins killed them or something. I think they were kind of overreacting but I take responsibility for my poor decision. 
5. I told someone that the agent couldn't talk because they were "busy" which I was then told is super rude because their clients should never feel like their agents are too busy for them. Alright. 
6. After I broke the shredder as stated previously, I told everyone that I was hungover from dollar beers from the night before and that's why I made such a silly mistake. They weren't impressed. 
7. I low key may have hit on my 32 year old boss who had a fiancé while buzzed at a work party. He turned me down. 
8. I sent out an important envelope but I forgot to put the important contents in the envelope. So I sent out an empty envelope essentially. Oops. 
9. Since I felt like part of the team one day, I joined in on a company meeting. However, I was also supposed to manage the phone if it rang. So in the middle of the meeting, the phone rings and I'm totally into the meeting so I don't hear it. Then, all of the sudden, like five people are looking at me. Finally someone is like "Go get the phone!" and I'm like oh shit. So I RUN to the front desk, and my own cell phone falls out of my pocket, it shatters, and all of my cards fall out because I had like my credit card, NYU school ID, metrocard, and more behind my phone. Then I pick up the phone in front of the OWNER of the company, transfer it to the wrong line, and he watches the whole thing go down. He then says, "At least that was the worst thing that'll happen to you today." Someone kindly returned my broken phone and all of its contents to me. I basically hid under the desk for the remainder of my day. 
10. And for the grand finale... this one's a real kicker! I got kicked out of the end of the summer party because I drank alcohol at a very strict venue and I had a wristband that clearly stated I was under 21. I even got escorted out by the bouncer like a true criminal. That was fun. 

 SOOOOO now that you know all of the horrible mistakes I've made, you're probably thinking, Wow Suzanne, I'm honestly shocked you ever got hired again. And dude, I know. Same. But here I am, I've had jobs since, done some successful things, and I have faith in a career post college. You're going to think I'm being cliche, but these mistakes actually allowed me to grow. I learned how to take responsibility and that it's better to always admit you're wrong, apologize, and try to move forward. 

 If you have any #internmistakes that are worse than mine, I'd love to hear. Like really, it would make my day. 

 Happy Intern SZN!

People Made Fun of Me for Posing on a Washing Machine But it Was So Fun


I'll fall fast asleep, and pretend I'm not dreaming bout' you-Jacob Lee, Slip, 2016

It was a rainy Friday morning and my good friend, Natasha, and I decided to venture under the river (I think that's right?) from Manhattan to Brooklyn. 

I've actually gone to Brooklyn more this year than probably any other year I've been in NYC and I have to say, I'm kind of hitting myself for not going more before. It's really fun being in a more neighborhood-y kind of place and they have CUTE stores! That's a major plus. 

Natasha and I actually bonded in the winter because we are both vegan and went vegan around the same time. I always knew who she was and thought she was really cool but I was scared to ask her to hangout. Anyway, when I realized she was vegan (through instagram posts), I slid into her DMs like any millennial fuqboy and suggested we get a vegan meal. 

And that was the beginning of a BEAUTIFUL friendship. Natasha and I both love being extra, taking pictures, venturing to new places, trying yummy food, tanning on her roof, and hanging out at my workplace. Can't think of a better friend to be honest. 

Anyways, back to the story. So we decided to head to Brooklyn and check out this cool museum called "The Dream Machine." It was only going to be here for a couple of months and since I'm someone that is obsessed with dreams, I figured, this is going to be right up my alley.

So I'm going to be totally honest here- I didn't learn shit about dreams. Like actually, I think there was only one quote about dreams the whole time and I don't even remember it (lol). The entire experience was basically the tourguide taking us into a room and saying, "Alright, take your pictures, do your thing." And then everyone around me just took a million photos. It was kind of hilarious. Or sad. It depends how you feel about the rise of social media in our world and the constant need to take pictures of everything you do.

But basically the Dream Machine was a photo shoot in every room. Now, I love taking photos and it's not because I look like a model because trust me, I don't. Alright, you probably can already tell that from my photos, but let's pretend you didn't know ;) 

I love taking photos because it's a way of expressing yourself. You strike a pose, play some fun music, and get to capture moments of your life forever. I'm not always in the mood to take photos but luckily Natasha and I were on the same page that day. We took photos eating cotton candy, in the laundry carts, touching clouds, jumping into a pit of balls, and in a cool lit up hallway. Now you may be reading this and thinking, these girls are insane, and you know what. We did feel kind of insane. But it was also so friggin fun and worth every second. 

The best part of the whole experience was that no one was judging. It was kind of like we all unapologetically decided that this was a place where we were all going to be EXTRA together. 

So if you're looking for a place to get a fire insta, and have no shame at all, The Dream Machine, if it's still there, would be my highest recommendation. Happy Laundry Day! 

@suzyque_18
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